Don Bradman knowledge a requirement for Australian citizenship
From today, any applicants for Australian citizenship need to fill out an Australian citizenship test. One question on the test is:
Which one of these Australians is famous for playing cricket?Obviously, anyone reading this blog will know the answer to this question. In fact, most readers should know Don Bradman's Test batting average to two decimal places and how many runs he needed in his last innings to have achieved a Test average of 100 (brownie points to the first commenter to post both answers).
A. Rod Laver
B. Sir Donald Bradman
C. Sir Hubert Opperman
But is this really an appropriate requirement to be a functioning member of Australian society? What's next - a 1000 word essay on the positive and negative impact of Twenty20 on international cricket? What annoys me is the narrow, conservative view that Prime Minister John "wish it was still the 50's" Howard imposes on the rest of Australian society - that Australia is all about battlers, diggers, mateship and sport. Never mind that not all of the country are sport-mad and/or male. Ironically, this is how such a diehard cricket tragic performs on the field:
For a good laugh, read this list of alternative citizenship questions - here are a few excerpts:
How many slabs can you fit in the back of a Falcon Ute while also allowing room for your cattle dog?
How many cans of beer did David Boon consume on a plane trip from Australia to England
On which Ashes tour did Warney's hair look the best?
a) 1993
b) 1997
c) 2001
d) 2005
Is it best to take a sick day on:
a) When the cricket's on
b) When the cricket's on
c) When the cricket’s on?
Did you cry when Molly died on a Country Practice?
| Posted by JC on Mon 1 Oct |  18 comments |
99.94 which is where the ABC
s mailing address comes from = PO BOX 9994 in your capital city.
Needed 4 in his last innings, actually went into the game with an average of 101.39, but fortunately for the broadcasters he got a duck - imagine the mess it'd make of all their average charts if they had to fit a 3 figure average in there.
Posted by Moses on 2007-10-01 23:08:27
s mailing address comes from = PO BOX 9994 in your capital city.
Needed 4 in his last innings, actually went into the game with an average of 101.39, but fortunately for the broadcasters he got a duck - imagine the mess it'd make of all their average charts if they had to fit a 3 figure average in there.
Posted by Moses on 2007-10-01 23:08:27
Sir Brad would remain God in batting, whomsoever may surface in eons to come.
Whatever the bowling, even if underarm, to score at 99.94 during your career which was cut into two by the 2nd World War... is simply stupendous.
You just have to salute the man!
Would have been more apt, if his surname read Batman, instead of Bradman.
Cheers
Mahesh
Posted by Mahesh on 2007-10-02 05:09:56
Whatever the bowling, even if underarm, to score at 99.94 during your career which was cut into two by the 2nd World War... is simply stupendous.
You just have to salute the man!
Would have been more apt, if his surname read Batman, instead of Bradman.
Cheers
Mahesh
Posted by Mahesh on 2007-10-02 05:09:56
Other citizenship questions:
A. Define these terms and use them correctly in a sentence.
(1) Wanker
(2) Rabbit Boiler
(3) Chuck a Ewie
(4) You're going home in the back of a pig van
B. What is a
(1) Lefthand Chinaman
(2) Full toss
(3) Tonk
(4) Trickle down the leg side
Posted by TA on 2007-10-02 10:40:14
A. Define these terms and use them correctly in a sentence.
(1) Wanker
(2) Rabbit Boiler
(3) Chuck a Ewie
(4) You're going home in the back of a pig van
B. What is a
(1) Lefthand Chinaman
(2) Full toss
(3) Tonk
(4) Trickle down the leg side
Posted by TA on 2007-10-02 10:40:14
Hey Mahesh, perhaps it'd be easier to change his name to Bruce Wayne...
Nice one's TA, there's nothing like cracking one through the covers to get the scoreboard ticking over..
Posted by Moses on 2007-10-02 11:06:47
Nice one's TA, there's nothing like cracking one through the covers to get the scoreboard ticking over..
Posted by Moses on 2007-10-02 11:06:47
Since when is it a requirement to be good at a sport to love a sport? Seems unduly harsh.
Posted by Andrew on 2007-10-02 12:49:51
Posted by Andrew on 2007-10-02 12:49:51
Hey, ya gotta know a bit about Aussie culture and cricket's the best way to test someone who wants to be an Australian. LONG LIVE AUSTRALIA!!! LOL :)
Posted by Aussie on 2007-10-02 14:59:14
Posted by Aussie on 2007-10-02 14:59:14
Maybe I was being harsh on John Howard but then am I really being unreasonable to expect him to bowl a cricket ball more than 2 feet? Is that too much to ask from the leader and most powerful man of the greatest cricketing nation on the planet? :-)
BTW, I thought "Chuck a Ewie" had something to do with sheep until I sounded it out in my head.
Posted by JC on 2007-10-02 15:22:41
BTW, I thought "Chuck a Ewie" had something to do with sheep until I sounded it out in my head.
Posted by JC on 2007-10-02 15:22:41
If you talk the talk, then you should be able to walk the walk.
I vote we ditch the written test and replace it with a physical examination of Australianess.
Item 1: Bowling a cricket ball
Item 2: Chucking shimp on the Barbie
Item 3: Pronunciation of everyday vernacular such as "Flaming Galah", "That's not a knife, this is a knife" and "G'Day"
Unfortunately under the new scheme Johnny will be deported to the Australian Antarctic Territory
Posted by Moses on 2007-10-02 16:45:59
I vote we ditch the written test and replace it with a physical examination of Australianess.
Item 1: Bowling a cricket ball
Item 2: Chucking shimp on the Barbie
Item 3: Pronunciation of everyday vernacular such as "Flaming Galah", "That's not a knife, this is a knife" and "G'Day"
Unfortunately under the new scheme Johnny will be deported to the Australian Antarctic Territory
Posted by Moses on 2007-10-02 16:45:59
Maybe I talk too soon. I'm starting up club cricket again this weekend - it'll be the first time I've played club cricket in nearly 2 decades. The last game of cricket I played was a church game about a decade ago - I made a 3 ball duck, caught at gully by a 60 year old pastor. So maybe I should see how things turn out on Saturday before I mock the Prime Minister's form...
... nah, he deserves it, I'm reasonably confident I can at least get the ball to the other end of the pitch.
Posted by JC on 2007-10-02 16:58:19
... nah, he deserves it, I'm reasonably confident I can at least get the ball to the other end of the pitch.
Posted by JC on 2007-10-02 16:58:19
Before I vote at the upcoming Federal elections I need to see Kevin 07 having a trundle. If he can mully-grub accurately down the pitch he has my vote!
Citizenship questions should be all sport-related. After all we have no culture. Sporting questions to include detailed knowledge of not only Bradman, but the Collingwood Football Club (must be able to sing Club song at least), Sydney City Roosters, the Wallabies, Warnie, Gillie and the Ashes.
And prospective citizens must be able to recite "I've been everywhere, man..". In full.
Posted by Dan Tas on 2007-10-02 17:10:17
Citizenship questions should be all sport-related. After all we have no culture. Sporting questions to include detailed knowledge of not only Bradman, but the Collingwood Football Club (must be able to sing Club song at least), Sydney City Roosters, the Wallabies, Warnie, Gillie and the Ashes.
And prospective citizens must be able to recite "I've been everywhere, man..". In full.
Posted by Dan Tas on 2007-10-02 17:10:17
If KRudd can bowl a decent mully-grubber he'll gain not only your vote but the votes of Greg and Trevor Chappel, plus any kiwi ex-pat's on the electoral roll with a sense of humour..
Beer and Sport Blog
Posted by Moses on 2007-10-02 17:53:20
Beer and Sport Blog
Posted by Moses on 2007-10-02 17:53:20
Obviously I'm not a true Aussie citizen. I thought Bradman's average was 99.96. Better deport me!
Posted by MT on 2007-10-02 20:38:18
Posted by MT on 2007-10-02 20:38:18
MT, I think most judges would look at your mistake without too much harshness (after all, the aggregate score was 6996, which is why I also used to get confused). You'll prob only get six months in a detention centre, forced to watch Tony Grieg pitch reports for six hours a day.
By the way, does anyone know a website to follow the India/Oz one day series ball by ball?
Posted by David on 2007-10-02 20:48:59
By the way, does anyone know a website to follow the India/Oz one day series ball by ball?
Posted by David on 2007-10-02 20:48:59
G'Day David,
here is your ball by ball.. better be quick though!
Beer and Sport, a match made in heaven
Posted by Moses on 2007-10-02 21:33:29
here is your ball by ball.. better be quick though!
Beer and Sport, a match made in heaven
Posted by Moses on 2007-10-02 21:33:29
David
Check out
www.cricinfo.com -or-
www.cricbuzz.com
for the ongoing ODI series (IND-AUS) or for that matter, any series played by any country...
These 2 sites are great with running ball-by-ball commentary..
Cheers
Mahesh
Posted by Mahesh on 2007-10-03 00:53:59
Check out
www.cricinfo.com -or-
www.cricbuzz.com
for the ongoing ODI series (IND-AUS) or for that matter, any series played by any country...
These 2 sites are great with running ball-by-ball commentary..
Cheers
Mahesh
Posted by Mahesh on 2007-10-03 00:53:59
Thanks for the help folks :)
Posted by David on 2007-10-03 07:09:47
Posted by David on 2007-10-03 07:09:47
well i'm definetly voting for Rudd.
Posted by Johan on 2007-10-26 01:02:44
Posted by Johan on 2007-10-26 01:02:44
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