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New Zealand's fancy pants


Australia employed GPS tracking and virtual batting studios to train their cricketers. England went so far to build a mechanical Shane Warne. Now New Zealand are bringing their squad into the 21st Century with their own innovation: high tech pants:

The trousers - manufactured by New Zealand-based outfitters Canterbury - were set to be used only from October, but they have been tried in practice. Also included is the micro-slide version for fielders, and the IonX BaseLayer performance underwear which is claimed to improve performance by 2.7%.

"To start with, we looked at putting two patches on the bowlers' trousers - one to shine the ball, and one to scuff it up, in case you wanted to produce reverse-swing. But we have since dropped the abrasive patch. I'm a member of MCC, and I didn't want to lose my membership for going against the spirit of cricket."

They say matches are won by those one-percenters, that extra bit of effort or skill that gives you the edge over your opponent. Now the Black Caps have underwear that apparently make them 2.7% better (but better at what?) Still, if matches are won by that 1% edge, their magic new undies should make them world beaters!


Posted by JC on Thu 5 Jun 13 comments
I'm fairly sure that pants, abrasive or not, don't figure in the laws of cricket!

The Kiwis have a good bowling line up but fail consistently with the bat - what they need is a magic piece of willow, not a magic grundy.
Posted by virtualgaz on 2008-06-05 22:27:56
I wonder if one Mr. Darrell Bruce Hair is officiating, will be "Debriefing" the entire team for "Ball Tampering". That will be one of the firsts in the Glorious History of the Game. The Wild streakers will have a good competition :D.

Or will the rules (or breaking of them) be taken into accounted when teams from subcontinent wear these pants.

Bats laced with graphite, pink balls , and now the pants for ball tampering, thus the game evolves….

Cheers,
Posted by unsuidojo on 2008-06-06 06:23:48
Poor Don Bradman. He played in an era when "performance underwear" was just a random pairing of words. (To be fair, it is still a random pairing of words. There can't be too many pairs of words in the English language that are more random.) He would have certainly achieved a three-figure average if he had IonX Base Layer pants.

However ,the Kiwis do not miss out on wins by 1%. They have lost four out of five test matches against an England side bereft of Flintoff, Jones, Harmison, Hoggard and Trescothick. In only two of those Test were they in the game after the second morning, and one of those was due to rain. If they are to be worth the money, these pants and trousers had better be so magical that they can actually give batting lessons to their top order.
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